Is it worth it?

My first introduction to skiing was in my early twenties hearing my guy friends talking about how much they loved it. Some of them even came back with broken bones or fractured shins to brag about. I personally had tried very few snow sports except ice skating and sledding, and didn't particularly love the idea of flying at high speeds down the side of a mountain. Honestly, I didn't have any desire to even try until I met my husband. 

He, like my other friends, talked about the glorious experience of skiing and not just the sport itself but the whole skiing culture - quaint chalets in the mountains, cozy fireplaces, warm drinks, gorgeous mountain landscapes to take in while exploring different routes. He talked about how good it was for the soul and even if one didn't ski there was so much good to just take in from the experience. So, at last I agreed that I would give it a try. 

We decided to plan a 4-day skiing trip to the country of Georgia in early spring. Now, in my head when I said try I was thinking more like maybe I can take one or two classes and then just relax and take in the beautiful scenery while Stephen zips along the mountainside. Stephen had a very different idea of what "try" meant. "You have to get the proper experience," he said, "so, that you can get a feel for what it's really like." I decided for better or for worse to go with his suggestion and we booked 3 days of classes for me - four hours each day. The idea was that by day four I could go skiing with Stephen on the slopes. 

Before we even got on the plane to go to Georgia, I felt nervous - what if I didn't like it? What if I couldn't get the hang of it? What if I injured myself while trying to learn? What if the whole trip was a failure? It didn't help when I was getting fitted out for ski gear at the rental shop and couldn't really understand what I needed to do or how everything worked. It didn't help when we got back to our apartment that first night and the music from the bar below was so loud the window was shaking. I was dreading the coming morning and the first class, but at the same time tried to put on a brave face for my husband. 

We woke up bright and early on day one. I silently got dressed layering up as Stephen had advised. We climbed downstairs to the basement where our ski gear was stored and laboriously strapped on our boots. How did I know how tight to make them? How did I hold the skis? How did I walk in the awkward confinement of a ski boot? All these questions and a million others poured through my head as we walked up to my ski instructor. 

Then, we approached the ski lift. From the moment we started walking I was receiving directions from my ski instructor - how to hold the skis, the proper protocol as we got in line to ride the enclosed ski lift, where to put the skis when you climb in, how to hold the ski poles. As we began to ascend, I tried not to look out - I didn't realize how high up ski lifts went or how afraid I would feel swaying in the wind as our little cable car moved carrying us further and further up the mountain. I didn't realize how uncomfortable the ski gear would be. I wanted the ride to end, but at the same time I didn't because then I would have to start skiing and by now I was quite terrified. 

When we arrived at the landing, both Stephen and my instructor helped me and my skies get out in time before the cable car continued on its circuit back down the mountain. As soon as we agreed on a meeting spot, Stephen was off ready to explore. My instructor and I made our way to the baby slope for training. Everything felt so slow awkward - walking, getting the skis on and off, maneuvering my body - I felt a bit like those guys in outer space gear. 

Thankfully, my ski instructor was used to beginners and we took things slowly the first day staying on the baby slope working on turning and stopping. I felt better after we started and knowing it was the first day, tried not to go too hard. My biggest complaint was my shins. No matter what position I tried or how much I moved my body weight forward as instructed, my shins were in pain. So, that evening I went to trade out my ski boots and hoped for the best. 

Day two arrived and I was ready - or so I thought. This time I could enjoy the ride up the mountain a bit better. After a good nights sleep, I was ready to tackle the baby slope and put into practice everything we had done the previous day. Far too quickly, my instructor said, "Alright now we're ready for the next slope". As the ski lift carried us over the path before us, my stomach dropped - how would I ever make it down that thing in one piece? I somehow managed to stay on my feet as we pushed off from the ski lift and positioned ourselves for the first run. Thinking about the slope ahead and my own limited skill my brain started to panic, I wanted to tell the ski instructor that I couldn't do it. I wanted to give her all the reasons why we should go back, but there was only one way down... 

I don't know how long it took me to go down that first time but it must have been at least an hour. I was trying to be so cautious and the instructor kept coaching me on different techniques. At some point about halfway down, I fell over in the soft snow and before I could get back up started to cry. My whole body was aching and my shins especially were in pain. I didn't feel safe - it seemed that at any moment I might spiral out of control and break something. No matter how much I tried to apply what my instructor said, I couldn't seem to get my body and legs coordinated. In that moment, I really just wanted to give up, but there was still only one way to get down...

Finally, the last day of classes dawned with the snow sparkling in the sunlight. As I relaxed in the ski lift, I I felt quite deflated. I had gained a lot of information in my head over the past two days, but I was having a hard time translating that to my body. My ski instructor graciously encouraged me on my progress, but internally I was my own biggest critic. As we approached the same slope from the previous day, this time she wanted me to go down without her voice guiding me. She wanted me to ski down as I saw fit with her there to help coach if I needed. Now that terrified me, but I knew she was right. I had to gain my own independence of how to ski if I was ever going to ski without her present. So, I gave it my best effort. 

I still distinctly remember getting all choked up and stopping once again halfway down that slope. My instructor was confused - I seemed to be gaining competence and I hadn't had a bad fall - why was I so upset? To which I responded through my tears, "I just can't get it right!" She chuckled and kindly reminded me that we were there to have fun and enjoy the process of learning - I could stop whenever I needed to stop and take my time enjoying the views. It's funny I needed her to tell me that, but after she did, I began to relax and enjoy myself more. I still didn't love it, but I wasn't terrified anymore. 

As the final day began, it felt rather odd to be ascending on the ski lift with just Stephen and not my ski instructor. I felt a bit nervous, but more so resigned - I would do my best and have fun while I tried. We went back to the same slope, now my third day approaching the top and this time I knew I would make it down just fine. I was a bit hesitant the first time down, so we went again to give me more confidence. Then, we went to the thing I had been rather dreading the entire time - a new slope, nothing crazy but new. I didn't have my instructor there to tell me where it got steep and where I needed to use parallel skis. I had to trust the tools given to me even if they weren't perfect. And guess what!? It worked!  

Not just twice, but three times - I zipped down that slope with Stephen. On the final time, I remember gaining enough speed in a flat area that I could lift my eyes off the snow in front of me to the mountains in the distance, and what a beautiful moment that was! Wind whistling by, snow crunching under my skis, my body gliding along, surrounded by majestic beauty. Now that is something I could enjoy!!